Colonoscopy and the Fear that Everyone Wants to Hurt Me

So, I have avoided submitting to the dreaded colonoscopy well beyond the recommended age that the screening is supposed to take place. For my international readers, all Americans are encouraged to be screened for colon cancer when they are 50. My husband went under the gun; I mean invited this home invasion; I mean was screened against his will and at the insistence of his doctor some years back. I am happy to report that he survived the procedure and entertained his caregivers with an overflow of hilariously unrestrained friendliness while recovering from the anesthesia.

On the other hand, I have strenuously resisted all attempts to convince me that such a screen was in my best interest. Have you noticed that telling God no is a surefire way to activate his “Oh yes you will?” Back in the day—waaay back, I am happy to report—I told God that I would never quit smoking pot; that he was wasting his time even going there.

Pot smoking was the first of my heathen bad habits to go away. It went so far away that even the thought of being in the same room with pot gives me the willies. Email me if you want the details.

Yes! God can change a mind. After telling the Lord “no thank you” to a colonoscopy; that I would take my chances with colon cancer, every single commercial on TV was about screening for colon cancer. Every Single One. Friends began sharing colon cancer stories. Colon cancer stories popped up on my FB news feed. One friend, whose mother had just been diagnosed via a colonoscopy, asked why on earth was I not getting a screening? To which I had to respond that I was scared out of my wits! I asked for prayer.

Here is what the Lord showed me. My heart believed beyond a doubt that Everyone Wants to Hurt Me. Are you aware that your heart is designed to believe absolutely without question? Once your heart settles into a belief, it is there for good unless some intervention takes place.

Blessed be the name of our God, I know how to intervene. I broke all vows to Never Forget that Everyone Wants to Hurt Me. I sent all attached evil spirits to the feet of Jesus to be judged there. And I firmly instructed my heart to stop believing what it believed. Instead, I directed it to believe this: All bad things happen because of the fall, not because everyone wants to hurt me. I then directed my heart to believe that No One Wants to Hurt Me (realizing the devil does but so what to him). A few days later, I made a doctor’s appointment and will be scheduling my lovely home invasion screen soon.

I feel no fear AT ALL.

I don’t think all of us have my heart belief, but I think many of us do. So, let’s pray together and break it.

-In Jesus’ name, I break the inner vow I took to Never Forget that Everyone Wants to Hurt Me. I break the assignments of any evil spirit attached to that vow. I send all evil spirits to the feet of Jesus to be judged.

-Heart, from now on you will stop believing that everyone wants to hurt me. Instead you will root and ground me in the grace and love of God.

-Lord, God, please heal all the hurts that have resulted because I believed in my heart that everyone wants to hurt me. Amen.

The above prayer may surface some hurts that need addressing in the presence of the Lord. I pray for you that you will be saturated in his love as you work through painful heart beliefs.

… it is good for the heart to be strengthened by grace … Hebrews 13:9

I may—or may not—report on how the colonoscopy goes 🙂

Hugs and blessings, 
Susan
205.556.4555 (Leave a message. We don’t answer unscheduled calls because of spammers).

Send me your emails. I love getting them.

Visit the website to donate. 
http://www.thepoolministries.org